The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
bring money and cleavage
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
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