i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
this will be a night to untag.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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