It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
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