Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
Randomize
