I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
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