I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
