Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
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