so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize
