so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
