I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize