No, you can still breathe under the balls.
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Randomize
