I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize
