Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
