you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
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