Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
Randomize
