Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
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