I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Randomize
