His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
Randomize
