evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
