chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
My mom is lecturing me about 'invaluable housekeeping skills' while I google 'cocktails involving gin' on my phone. I can feel the generational gap looming in her silent judgment of my choices.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
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