Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
