I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
