When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
I can't trust your balls anymore.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
