More tranny stories later!
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Randomize
