Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
high people should be assigned attendants
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
I just forgot I was standing up.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Randomize
