I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
