nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
should my penis look like a turkey
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
Randomize
