Are we in a gay sports bar?
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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