We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
