I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
Randomize
