There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Randomize
