my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
