We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
Randomize
