How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
