i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
Randomize
