I have demons in me.
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
