My girlfriend figured out who you are.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
