Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk
discrete masterbation is a lost art
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Sex in the backyard? Check.
And then he peed in my hair
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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