That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
BRING THE BAGELS
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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