When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
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