alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
Randomize
