3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
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