he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
