He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize