i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
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