now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Randomize