and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
