So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
