i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Randomize
