Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Randomize
